seven days and counting

Things I Will Not Miss About My Apartment:

1. If you know me, number one is obvious.
2. The Heffalumps who live upstairs with their stomping and incessant vacuuming.
3. Living on a one-way street.
4. Trying to give people directions to an apartment on a one-way street.
5. The emptying of the dumpster directly behind my unit at five in the morning.
6. Living behind a major restaurant, a busy gas station, and beside a grocery store and being awakened by delivery trucks every morning.
7. The valet boys who run up and down the alley and give me dirty looks when I cut through their parking lot.
8. Having a landlord who owns a gazillion properties and doesn't care about fixing stuff in mine.
9. Ceramic fish.
10. Almost dying every time I pull out of the alley.
11. Knowing when every fire or emergency occurs because of the nearness of the fire station.
12. The lake that forms in the parking lot every time it rains.
13. The dude across the hall who smokes the ganja all day long.