Thursday, March 12, 2009


Dear "Academic Adviser":

Below are some helpful hints to remember while in an academic advising session:

  1. Know more about your programs than the prospective student.
  2. Know the names of your fellow professors, and what they do within the department.
  3. Know the dates when students may register for classes.
  4. Do not refer the student to other advisers because you can not answer his or her questions. There is a reason why you were selected as the adviser - so, advise.
  5. Do not spend more time in an advising session talking about how you got your book published than about the student's classes.
  6. Do not say anything like, "I advise during the day so I can write what I want to publish at night." It gives the impression that you're neither interested in your job, nor the student's future in your program.
Also, if you wouldn't mind, I'd like to have the money back that I had to pay the meter for parking. The visit wasn't really worth my thirty-five cents, especially since I had to pay another meter at the place I went to actually get some questions answered.

Oh, and buy some longer pants.


1 comment:

Amy said...

Welcome to UAB. Where advisors are confused, wear ugly shoes, and have framed pictures of their dogs on their desks. They sigh patiently (or is it impatiently? i forget) at your questions, forgetting that that is why you are there... to ask questions. They say things like, "I don't know, I'll have to get back to you on that." Really advisor lady? Because there are 4 other students in line to have this same informationless conversation with you and you're going to remember to "get back with me?"
I always want to run over an innocent pedestrian after those sessions.